Setting: two rats, each has a running wheel. Rat number one runs whenever it wants to, rat number two is forced to run whenever rat number one runs.
As a result, rat number one gets all the benefit of exercise: better cardiovascular system, better sleep, better mood, six packs and higher SAT scores, all that sweet deal.
Rat number two, however, gets none of the benefit. What’s more, it gets all the downsides of severe stress, higher stress hormone levels, higher blood pressures, more likely to get ulcers, or ends up playing Minecraft all night long (idk, what games are kids playing these days?).
This study is brought up by Robert Sapolsky in his podcast episode with Andrew Huberman.
This might be why it’s rarely worth to force change on people, even the clearly beneficial ones. And that includes not to force ourselves.
The first step to build a habit, to change life for the better, to do any hard things that’s the right thing to do, is to accept it. To be committed, to say to ourself that this is my choice of suffering.
The body’s tendency toward laziness and mind’s tendency towards idleness will constantly stress test this, they’ll constantly ask you “why”, why on earth are we doing this. And when we can no longer give a satisfying answer to that, we tend to stop, or if we try to force it, true misery ensues.
I have many first hand experiences of being the rat number two, too many to count. Even with blogging, some days I came up with topics that felt more like a task - maybe the limbic system (emotional brain) doesn’t care, but my PFC (logic part) thought we ought to do it anyway. Then I find myself coming up with all sorts of weird ways to distract myself. I feel friction at every step, and I tend to drag on for hours to finish it.
When I feel like I am writing it for myself, it’s much easier. For me a good question to ask is “Would I write it if nobody’s gonna read it?” If the answer is yes, I usually find the whole process much more enjoyable.
Try to do it for the right reason. Don’t be rat number two.