S6E01: Good mourning.
According to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, when we are dying, or have suffered a catastrophic loss, we all move through five distinct stages of grief.
We go into denial, because the loss is so unthinkable, we can’t imagine it’s true.
We become angry with everyone, angry with survivors, angry with ourselves.
Then we bargain.
We beg, we plead. We offer everything we have, we offer up our souls, in exchange for just one more day.
When the bargaining has failed, and the anger is too hard to maintain, we fall into depression, despair, until finally, we have to accept that we had done every thing we can. We let go.
We let go and move into acceptance.
In medical school we have a hundred classes that teach you how to fight off death, and not one lesson in how to go on living.
S6E02: Goodbye.
The dictionary defines grief as keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss: sharp sorrow, painful regret.
As surgeons, as scientists, we want to learn from and rely on books, on definitions, on definitives.
But in life, strict definitions rarely apply. In life, grief can look like a lot things that bare little resemblance to sharp sorrow.
(Lexi:) Grief may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on every one.
(Mark:) It isn’t just death we have to grieve. It’s life. It’s loss. It’s change.
(Alex:) And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, has to hurt so bad. The thing we gotta try to remember is that it can turn on a dime.
(Izzi:) That’s how you stay alive. When it hurts so much you can’t breath, that’s how you survive.
(Derek:) By remembering that one day, somehow, impossibly, it won’t feel this way, it won’t hurt this much.
(Bailey:) Grief comes in its own time for every one, in its own way.
(Owen:) So the best we can do, the best any one can do, is try for honesty.
(Meredith:) The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief, is that you can’t control it.
(Arizona:) The best we can do it try to let ourselves feel it when it comes.
(Callie:) And let it go when we can.
(Meredith:) The very worst part is that the minute you think you’re passed it, it starts all over again.
(Cristina) And always, everytime, it takes your breath away.
(Meredith:) There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us, but there are always five.
(Alex:) Denial.
(Derek:) Anger.
(Bailey:) Bargaining.
(Lexi:) Depression.
(Richard:) Acceptance.